Frankenstein - Mary Shelley

There is a reason why some books continue to be important long after they were written. Frankenstein is as much a treatise on the meaning of life and the very concept of humanity as it is a work of horror. Sure, it's not as terrifying now as it was when it was first written. Of course you've seen The Munsters since this book was written, so your concept of the square-headed clumsy monster (that isn't the way he's portrayed in the book, by the way. He speaks fluent French and is quite agile)has probably dulled you to what readers in Shelley's day found to be absolutely terrifying.

This book is as important as it is great, and it surely is both. It is the first notable work of science fiction ever written, and remains one of the true masterpieces in the genre. It also shook the dust off Gothic fiction and gave the genre legs enough to keep moving into a new century. Finally, it is now and will remain a major cultural touchstone. Your very life will be enriched by reading this book.

If you give Frankenstein half a chance and accept it for what it is, rather than what you think it should be, you'll enjoy it.

The Monk - Matthew Gregory Lewis

By the end of this book, I could scarcely believe how far the story had gone. If you ever want to see what a real downward spiral looks like, take a look at The Monk. This is a prime example of Gothic fiction, and one of the more sickening tales you'll ever come across (no, really. I was less disgusted by "Titus Andronicus"). 

I was really surprised by how gripping the book was. Many things which were shocking 200+ years ago barely move the dial nowadays, but The Monk holds up. It's still shocking and quite the wild ride. You can really see why it was such a controversial book when it was first printed. No doubt the Catholics of the day did not find it at all amusing.

The Castle of Otranto - Horace Walpole

This book is more notable for establishing and defining a genre than being the best work in that genre. If you've ever wondered why things are termed "Gothic" when they have no connection whatsoever to the Germanic tribes that sacked Rome, look no further than this book. Walpole initially presented "The Castle of Otranto" as a translation of a Gothic tale. In the second edition he copped to the authorship, but the usage of the term "Gothic" to refer to anything with a tendency toward the occult and/or macabre was already established (also partially due to a revival of Gothic architecture, which Walpole happened to be involved in as well). So there you have it: from Walpole to The Cure to the kid in the funny pants at Hot Topic. The book itself is fairly interesting and an ok read (though the fourth chapter is bo-ho-ho-horing). Check it out if you ever want to know where all this Gothic business came from. If you're looking for great Gothic fiction, however, I would probably point you somewhere else.

alaska! - Emotions

alaska! is comprised of Lowercase's Imaad Wasif and Sebadoh's Russell Pollard. They churn out what appears to be some sort of alternative-ish grunge-ish indie-ish chum. I'm not uncomfortable listening to bands that defy genre (The Mars Volta, anyone?) but alaska! didn't really move me much.

The problem with this album is that it's a tweener. It's not that it exists between genres, but between varying levels of quality. Some of the songs are pretty good while others are not so much. I'm playing it as I write this review, and I genuinely can't decide whether or not I want to delete it. I guess the real test is the fact that I really can't see myself listening to this album again. I'm not even sure where I got it. If I had to guess, I'd say my friend Amber gave it to me. I haven't heard nor seen from her in a few years, so I guess she won't mind if this one doesn't make the cut.

Baleeted? Unfortunately, yes.

Enchanted Soundtrack

My wife and I were engaged when Enchanted came out. We went to see it on its opening weekend, and were surprised to see that we were the only adults who were not accompanying children. While Enchanted will surely appeal to kids, this is a fairy tale for adults. It questions the very possibility of the fairy tale ideal, and finds a happy medium somewhere between the ridiculousness of fairy tales and the harshness of the real world.

While the movie is not an all-out musical (though Broadway's unoriginality and Disney's desire to turn a buck will definitely turn this movie into a musical sometime in the very near future. Will I go see it? Yes. I never said I wasn't dumb or easily duped out of my money) there are plenty of great showtunes in the score. Unfortunately, there aren't quite enough to fill the soundtrack, so they had to tack on some of the instrumental tracks to flesh things out. The instrumental tracks are fairly unremarkable. They mainly restate the themes from the vocal tracks in a longer and more boring way.

Although this soundtrack is a bit of a mixed bag, the vocal tracks are so good they make this a worthy purchase. If you're buying it on itunes, just get the first 5 tracks. If you buy the CD, only listen to the first 5 tracks.

Baleeted? Nope.

Alan Jackson - Greatest Hits Collection

Other than Garth Brooks, nobody churned out more country hits in the 90's than Alan Jackson.

I've had a difficult relationship with Alan Jackson over the years. I grew up in a small town which subscribed to the same view of music as Bob's Country Bunker ("We got both kinds of music: country and western"). Although I still somehow managed to learn how to country dance, I rebelled against country music during the 90's. I was all about grunge, punk, ska, and anything else that wasn't country. Over time I came back to my roots, incorporating country back into my listening repertoire. More than anyone else, I had to make my peace with Alan Jackson. While I merely disliked other country artists, I openly hated Jackson for songs like "Tall Tall Trees." When I finally learned to be okay with that song, my journey back to the dark side was complete. In making peace with country, I was making peace with myself and my own background. Nowadays I'm just as comfortable with country as I am with the more esoteric parts of my collection (probably all my Wildebeests 45's).

Alan Jackson is a country music staple. Songs like "Chatahoochie," "Gone Country," and "Don't Rock the Jukebox" should be required listening for any country music fan. Alan Jackson's signature twang is unmistakable, and this compilation of hits from the first part of his career is evidence of the man's greatness and importance to the genre.

Baleeted? Nope.

Al Green - Compact Command Performances: 14 Greatest Hits

Al Green is amazing. His voice is sweet, smooth, and soulful. He is exactly the type of artist who absolutely killed it in his day, but wouldn't fly on any of the twelve billion tv-based singing competitions which favor pointless vocal noodling over actual talent and soul. If you want to know what soulful singing really sounds like, toss your american idol crap into an industrial shredder and give "Tired of Being Alone" a spin.

My beef with every single tv singing competition aside, this is a fantastic compilation. It is not the most thorough compilation of Al Green's greatness, but every single track is a stone-cold slice of soul. Sure, I could point you in the direction of compilations with more tracks (The Definitive Greatest Hits) or compilations that give a greater overview of the man's career (The Immortal Soul of Al Green), but this compilation gives you exactly what it is supposed to: 14 of Al Green's greatest soul tracks.

Baleeted? Nope.

Upping the Ante

Now that I'm going through my digital albums as well as my vinyl, I have the option of doing something I've always wanted to do with my massive mp3 collection (No, seriously, I have over 260 gigs worth of music): weed out the junk.

Here's the new rule: anything in my mp3 collection that doesn't get 3 stars or more gets....baleeted! From here on out it's be awesome or get out. It's win or go home. It's rock my socks or I'll clean your clock. It's be super great or suffer an ignominious fate. It's perform at a high level while meeting or exceeding expectations or don't and suffer the fate of those who are cast aside as dross to be trod upon by the feet of man and beast.

The X-Men Awards

A couple months ago I read and/or caught up the the present day in all the X-Men titles (except X-Force and the Wolverine solo titles, which I will read eventually, but not until I get a little more variety in my comic book diet). Because I've taken in a metric tonne of X-Men comics, I thought it might be a good idea to hand out a few awards to my favorite storylines, favorite artists, favorite writers, and a few things I didn't like. So here they are, probably the only X-Men awards I'll ever do.

Greatest X-Men Series

Winner: Uncanny X-men

This was really a no-brainer. I just love the original. The first 20 years of the series were simply beyond reproach. Many would argue that the series has had some major ups and downs since its beginnings, but it started great, is currently great, and had a whole of great in between.







Runners Up:

1. X-Men Legacy (aka X-Men, aka New X-Men) - It's hard to not love the title that shared the main X-Men storyline beginning in the 1990s.

2. X-Men (aka X-Men Volume 3) - Although it's a fairly new title, I'm loving it. The artwork is fantastic, and the series feels fresh and interesting.

3. Astonishing X-Men - Joss Whedon is king of the nerds, and his great X-Men series only affirms that fact. The artwork took a dive after Whedon and his artist John Cassaday left, but Warren Ellis is a great writer, and his stories succeed in spite of the sometimes less than stellar artwork.

4. Wolverine and the X-Men - Another very new series which has shown a lot of promise. The fact that it's named after the animated series that got me started reading comic books in the first place is also helpful.

5. X-Men Forever - I wanted to like this one more than I actually did. Chris Claremont pulls some series weight in the world of X-Men, and I thought letting him have his own X-Men series and do whatever he wanted with it would be better than it actually was. This series was a little disappointing.

6. X-Men Unlimited - X-Men Unlimited was conceived as a series which would tell the stories that happen between the issues of the other X-Men titles. As such, it's somewhat less important than the other X-Men series. There are a few interesting things that happen in the series, but they're too few and far between.

7. Ultimate X-Men - The Marvel Ultimate universe re-imagines and updates some of the more notable Marvel heroes. I really didn't like this series because I found that it tried way too hard to be hip and with it.

8. Xtreme X-Men - Nope. Also, this.

Greatest Storyline

Winner: Giant Size X-Men #1

The X-Men were floundering on the verge of cancellation before Giant-Size X-men came out. No, really. In the 1970's Marvel began running old issues from the 1960's because X-Men wasn't a very popular series at the time. Giant-Size X-Men was a last-ditch bid to revive the series and it totally worked. 

Most importantly, Giant-Size X-Men brought in Storm, Colossus, Nightcrawler, Thunderbird, and Wolverine. The addition of all these new heroes really shook up the X-Men as a group, and provided a major shot in the arm to the team as well as the series as a whole.

The story of how all the new X-Men were brought in and how they learned to mesh and fight alongside the existing X-Men is one of the best and most intriguing things that ever happened in the world of mutants. Sure, there have been more shocking storylines, there have been more involved storylines, but the events that took place in Giant Size X-Men and the issues immediately following are hands down the best and most important things to ever happen in the world of the X-Men. 

Runners Up:

1. The Dark Phoenix Saga - Jean Grey's turn as an unstoppable force which unknowingly destroys a planet and billions of people is a mind-blowing tale.

2. Onslaught - Professor X turned evil, giant, and unstoppable? Yes, please.

3. House of M - House of M was a major shakeup in the world of mutants that left some of them powerless, and others dead. It's the Marvel equivalent of the DC Crises.

4. Days of Future Past - Mind-bending and a whole lot of fun.

Best Artist

Winner: Jack Kirby

Yes, there have been more complex and flashy artists in the history of X-Men, but I still can't get over the original. Part of it is the fact that I just really love the simplicity and fun of the Marvel comics from the 1960's. Jack Kirby's artwork perfectly complimented Stan Lee's stellar writing. Jack Kirby gave the X-Men their look, and set the tone for the series.





Runners Up: 

1. John Byrne - This is another subjective pick. John Byrne was a phenomenon. For Alpha Flight he did both the stories and the artwork. For the X-Men, he kept the spirit of Jack Kirby's original artwork alive while bridging the gap for the future of X-Men.

2. Jim Lee - Jim Lee is an X-Men artist that everyone seems to agree on. Many feel he is the very best artist to ever draw the X-Men. I can see that argument, but I have my own preferences.

3. John Cassaday - Half of the reason why the first 24 issues of Astonishing X-Men were so astonishing. Seriously, go look at the series, it looks amazing.

4. Marc Silvestri - Marc Silvestri kept the X-Men looking good through the 80's and early 90's when there were a number of aesthetic crimes being committed throughout the comic book world.

Worst Artist

Winner: Kaare Andrews

Just look a this image. Look at what he did to Storm and Emma Frost. Has Kaare Andrews ever seen a woman in real life? Is he aware of the fact that other artists, including the amateurs on Deviantart, actually make the female X-Men look attractive? This cover is bad and Kaare Andrews should feel bad.

Runners  Up:

1. Frank Quitely

What happened here? Does Frank Quitely know that Emma Frost is not asian? Also, does he know that she is not a tranny?

2. Kia Asamiya

The X-Men don't all have the same pointy manga nose. I don't read anime as a personal choice, and I hated it when Marvel forced me to.

Best Writer

Winner: Stan Lee - Could it be anyone else? Yes, I know I've been picking all the old timers over the new schoolers, but that's just the way I feel. I don't know that I would have gotten very far in my comic book reading if it weren't for Stan's signature style. His writing actively mentored me, and drew me into the comics. It's why I love Marvel's 60's output so much.

Runners Up:

1. Grant Morrison - I'm getting tired of writing blurbs. Just as tired as you're getting of reading them, provided anyone ever decided to read this.

2. Scott Lobdell

3. Joss Whedon

4. Matt Fraction

Most Perplexing Writer

Winner: Chris Claremont - Once again, could it be anyone else? Chris Claremont is sometimes one of the best things to ever happen to the X-Men and at other times one of the worst. He gave us The Dark Phoenix Saga, but he also gave us the X-Babies. Like I said, he's the most perplexing writer in the world of X-Men.

Anyway, I was going to give a bunch of awards for things like worst teamup (Power Pack, with X-Babies following close behind), best relationship (Cyclops and Jean Grey with Colossus and Kitty Pryde following close behind), relationship that you seem to be okay with but secretly hate (Cyclops and Emma Frost), but I am getting bored with my own awards. Let's just wrap this up.

First 10 - Daredevil

I think I've mentioned many times before that I love Marvel comics from the 1960's. The Silver Age of Comic Books was the Golden Age for Stan Lee and company. The man was literally inventing the universe, and everything was fresh and new.

In interviews, Stan Lee has admitted to the fact that with each new series he was looking for a way  to make the hero different from every other hero in the Marvel stable. The first issue of Dardevil actually boasts about the fact that The Man Without Fear has a secret which makes him different from Spider-Man and the Fantastic Four. Daredevil's secret is that he is blind, but his other senses were given a super boost due to his exposure to radioactive materials in the accident that took his sight. The origin story is a bit of a stretch, but if you buy into a guy getting super powers from a radioactive spider, you can't really be picky with the sources of your super powers.

Matt Murdock (aka Daredevil) is also an interesting case because not only is he a blind superhero, he's also a crack lawyer. In the first 10 issues of Daredevil, Matt's legal career is a bit of a joke. He goes from graduating law school in issue #1 to being one of the most respected lawyers in town by issue #3. Also, I was really bugged by the fact that more than once he got a phone call, accepted a client, and went to court all in the same day. He was trying cases without studying legal precedent, without knowing any of the relevant facts, and without even meeting the client until he stepped into the courtroom. Even Perry Mason wasn't that good.

The action in Daredevil is good because he relies so heavily on his senses. When he's underwater or driving in a car, or flying in a plane, he isn't able to use his super senses the way he could in a quiet room. Oh, and Daredevil undergoes a couple important costume changes in the first 10 issues alone. He starts off in the yellow and red that you see above. Then he adds a red hood to store his street clothes in. This turns out to be a bad idea (partially due to the fan reaction) and he scraps it. Finally he settles into the red on red outfit which he still wears today.

The unfortunate thing about the first 10 issues of Daredevil is that you never really get a sense for who his nemesis is. Heroes live and die by the strength of their nemeses, and while Daredevil will eventually face off against Bullseye, Kingpin, and many others, the first 10 issues find him handling foes in 20 pages or less. He even kills a couple guys. The most disappointing turn is the fact that The Fixer, the mob boss and boxing promoter who killed Daredevil's father, is tracked down and disposed of in the very first issue. You have to be able to doggedly track your parent's killer for hundreds of issues before finding them, beating them to the point where their life is in your hands, and pondering whether revenge is truly worth the cost. Letting The Fixer go early was a bad job by Stan Lee, who doesn't often whiff on such things.

All in all, Daredevil is standard 1960's Marvel goodness. I know the series eventually takes a turn for the much, much darker when it moved to the Marvel Knights imprint, but I'm prepared for that. I know I'll want to read Daredevil eventually, but I can't say that it's higher on the List than Spider-Man. Here's where things fall:

1. Batman
2. Amazing Spider-Man
3. Fantastic Four
4. Booster Gold
5. Daredevil
6. The Punisher
7. Golden Age Green Lantern
8. The Avengers
9. Captain America
10. Golden Age Captain America
11. Golden Age Blue Beetle
12. Captain Marvel (Marvel Comics)
13. Aquaman

First 10 - Captain Marvel

Captain Marvel's first appearance in Marvel Comics is the result of some ridiculous behind-the-scenes antics on the part of both DC and Marvel. As I understand it, here's how it went down:

Back in the 1940's Fawcett Comics ran a series called Captain Marvel, which followed the life of a normal guy named Billy Batson who would turn into the Superman-esque hero whenever he said the word, "Shazam!" Captain Marvel was actually a more popular hero than Superman in the Golden Age, based on sales alone. After more than a decade of publication, DC decided that Captain Marvel was a bit too Superman-esque. A lawsuit ensued and Fawcett lost. They ceased publication of all Captain Marvel titles, crippling the company. DC later acquired the rights to the Captain Marvel character from Fawcett, but Marvel Comics decided to mess with DC for no good reason. Marvel invented Captain Marvel (given name: Mar-Vell. No kidding) before DC could come out with a Captain Marvel series of their own. DC was then forced to call their Captain Marvel title Shazam!, which it remains to the present day. Marvel's Captain Marvel has never been a very financially or critically successful venture, but in order to keep the rights to the series name, Marvel has to keep at least sporadically publishing Captain Marvel material. Now if that doesn't make you want to read the series, I don't know what will.

I knew the tangled history of Captain Marvel before reading these first 10 issues, and I honestly didn't expect too much of it. I found that the stories were generally better written than I expected, and Mer-Vell as a character was more compelling than I thought he'd be. What you need to understand, however, is that I thought Captain Marvel would be a giant turd. What it actually is is a fair-to-middling super-powered alien series.

Captain Marvel is a Kree (one of the major alien races in the Marvel Universe) warrior who decides to protect the earth after being sent on a fact-finding mission by the powers that be in the Kree empire. The major problem with the series is that you can feel it grasping for straws almost from the beginning. No Marvel hero has undergone more changes than Captain Marvel. His continuity is probably the most befuddling in the entire universe. The character has been revamped several times, but has never been a big draw. His main purpose seems to be keeping DC from being able to publish Shazam! under the title of Captain Marvel.

The most compelling part of the series for me was the fact that Mar-Vell has a working relationship with Carol Danvers, who eventually becomes the infinitely more compelling Ms. Marvel. I enjoyed this series more than I expected, but a whole lot less than some of the others I've read. That said, he's better than Aquaman. Here are the current First 10 Standings:

1. Batman
2. Amazing Spider-Man
3. Fantastic Four
4. Booster Gold
5. The Punisher
6. Golden Age Green Lantern
7. The Avengers
8. Captain America
9. Golden Age Captain America
10. Golden Age Blue Beetle
11. Captain Marvel (Marvel Comics)
12. Aquaman

The Byrds - Sweetheart of the Rodeo

Sweetheart of the Rodeo is most famous for being the record on which The Byrds brought in Gram Parsons in order to transition from their folk and/or psychedelic sound to country. Gram Parsons is the godfather of country rock, and an artist whose albums you should own. Ryan Adams should never stop thanking the heavens that Gram Parsons invented country rock. No, really.

Anyway, despite the fact that Gram Parsons is the cat's own pajamas, his vocals were removed for the final cut of this album due to legal difficulties. The infighting, jealousy, and legal difficulties surrounding this album are legendary on their own, but the music is so amazing you'd hardly notice.

Interestingly, none of the tracks on this album are written by The Byrds. Most of them are covers of traditional country and folk songs such as The Louvin Brothers' "The Christian Life," and Bob Dylan's "You Ain't Goin' Nowhere" (which actually eclipses the original in awesomeness). Gram Parsons penned two tracks for the album, one of them being his famous "Hickory Wind." The version of the song on Parsons' own Grievous Angel is by far the better recording, but The Byrds give it a solid go here on Sweetheart of the Rodeo.

Perhaps the most interesting thing about listening to Sweetheart of the Rodeo   45 years after its initial release is that it sounds more like country than just about everything Taylor Swift or Keith Urban has ever done. Back in 1968, Gram Parsons was viewed as a hippie by the country music establishment (Merle Haggard famously refused to work with him for this very reason) and The Byrds were also perceived as freaky longhairs by the Nashville elite.

Regardless of where you stand on country music, there is plenty of great music on this record. The harmonies are tight and the arrangements are impeccable. Nearly a half century later, Sweetheart of the Rodeo is one of the greatest country rock albums ever made.

Buffalo Springfield - Buffalo Springfield Again

Buffalo Springfield was a pre-supergroup or a proto-supergroup or whatever you call a group that was plenty famous on its own, but the members of which went on to be more famous as solo artists or as members of other groups. Most notably the group featured a young Neil Young as well as Stephen Stills, and that's not even to mention Richie Furay who was one of the founding members of Poco or Jim Messina (who was not yet with the band at the time this album was recorded) also of Poco as well as Loggins and Messina.

Regardless of what the individual members of Buffalo Springfield would eventually accomplish, Buffalo Springfield was all sorts of awesome in their own right. They blended elements of rock, country, folk, and blues in unique and endlessly fascinating ways. Buffalo Springfield Again is a perfect example of the band's genre-bending and genre-hopping abilities. The songwriting duties were shared between everybody except Dewey Martin and Bruce Palmer (drums and bass respectively). Stephen Stills really shines on this album with "Bluebird" and "Rock & Roll Woman," but Neil Young's "Mr. Soul" and "Expecting to Fly" are great songs in their own right. This album is a delight from top to bottom, and one of the best slices of Americana I have ever heard. If you love The Band and/or Gram Parsons, you need this album.

Buckner and Garcia - Pac-Man Fever

This is the type of record that doesn't happen very much anymore: the gimmick and/or novelty record. Of course we all wish this ridiculous non-musical auto-tune trend would dry up and blow away, but that's a jab unrelated to the review of this record.

Buckner and Garcia's Pac-Man Fever is surprisingly good for a novelty record. As a longtime lover of all things Atari, this record is right up my alley. Each track puts a different Atari game to music. While "Pac-Man Fever" is the most famous song on the album, I actually found that "Froggy's Lament" was the better song. "Do the Donkey Kong" also provided a lot of fun, especially for my wife and I who have a friend who invented a dance called The Donkey Kong.

While many of the songs focus on Atari games you probably know (Pac-Man, Frogger, Centipede, Donkey Kong, Defender, Berzerk), there are others which are a little more obscure (Hyperspace, Mousetrap). Between writing the last sentence and this one, and went and checked and found that I own every single one of the games featured on this album. So there's that.

In addition to the kitschy fun of the music on this album, the record sleeve includes patterns for evading the ghosts and picking up the fruit bonuses for each level. It makes me want to play a little Pac-Man just to see if the patterns hold up. Anyway, this is a fun album. It's not the greatest thing I own, but my wife and daughter had a little dance party when I put it on. I highly recommend this record to Atari dorks and collectors of kitsch.

Dave Brubeck - All-Time Greatest Hits

There's really only one reason I bought this record: I wanted to own "Take Five," and I couldn't find a copy of Time Out. This unassuming double LP compilation was actually much better than I expected. The album opens with "Take Five," and closes with "Blue Rondo a la Turk," which I consider to be Brubeck's best two tracks. Oddly enough, both of these songs are featured on the A-side of Time Out. I really need to get my hands on a copy of that classic album.

Anyway, there is plenty of very enjoyable jazz between the two most essential tracks. "Night and Day" is a fascinating take on the Cole Porter classic. "Camptown Races" proves that Brubeck can turn event the most pedestrian of tunes into jazz gold. While this compilation does not include all of Brubeck's greatest (notably missing is Brubeck's take on "Take the 'A' Train"), there is still a large helping of high-quality jazz on this compilation. I honestly didn't think this compilation would be very good (indicators? The generic artwork, the track listing on the front cover, the fact that I couldn't find very much information about this compilation online, etc.) but it was a very enjoyable listen. Of course I need to own more of Brubeck's studio albums, but this is a decent stand-in until I can get the cash to do so.